mirror of git://git.acid.vegas/ircart.git
65 lines
2.6 KiB
Plaintext
65 lines
2.6 KiB
Plaintext
_________ ________
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\ \ / \
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| \ / _______\ ___ ^
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| _ | | | ____ | .\ / \
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| (_) | | | |____\ | / / . \
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| | | |___\ \ | .\ | _ |
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| | | | |__/ |/ \|
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\________/ \__________/
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/\ /\
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/ V \
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/ /\ /\ \
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/ / / \ \ \
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/ / / \ \ \ -OMGba
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/_/ / \ \_\
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/_______\
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THIS
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THIS GAME HAS RAT WHO COOKS BUT HE DOES NOT COOK
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VERY MUCH IN THIS GAME. HIS RESTAURANT MUST BE
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FAILING WITH ALL OF THE TIME OFF HE IS TAKING.
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THIS IS WHY SMALL BUSINESSES FAIL SO MCUH IT IS
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A LACK OF WORK ETHIC.
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HE IS BUSY SLIDING DOWN WALLS AND JUMPING OFF OF
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THEM LIKE MEGAMANS IN MEGAMAN X. EXCEPT HE IS
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AS EFFECTIVE AS MEGAMAN WITHOUT A ROBOT SUIT AND
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EQUIPPED WITH ONLY RUSH MARINE FOR THE ENTIRE GAME
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AND ALSO WITHOUT THE ABILITY TO ATTACK.
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MAN.
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WHAT WAS THE DEAL WITH THAT MOVIE EVAN ALMIGHTY.
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STEVE CARELL IS SUCH A DICK NO I WILL NOT DO THE
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DANCE SHUT THE FUCK UP IS THAT THE CHICK FROM
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GILMORE GIRLS WTF GET OUT OF THE MOVIE. HOW
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MANY TIMES DOES THE MAN HAVE TO CONVINCE YOU
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THAT HE IS GOD BEFORE YOU FUCKING LISTEN TO HIM.
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HE KNOWS EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU A GODDAM ZOO IS
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FOLLOWING YOU AND YOU LOOK LIKE KENNY ROGERS
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AND SPEAKING OF THE GAMBLER YOU SHOULD KNOW WHEN
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TO HOLD EM KNOW WHEN TO FOLD EM - FOLD YOUR
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CAREER STEVE CARELL IF YOUR CHARACTER WAS SUPPOSED
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TO HAVE BEEN HIGH IN THE MOVIE INSTEAD OF BEING
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TALKED TO BY GOD YOU WOULD NOT HAVE HAD TO CHANGE
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YOUR PERFORMANCE. SUCH VERSATILITY. ALSO WHY
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DIDNT GOD JUST STOP THE "FLOOD" (FUKKEN SMALLEST
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AMOUNT OF WATER EVER THEY COULD HAVE JUST DRIVEN
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2 MILES AND BEEN FINE). GOD IS SUCH A DICK.
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MORGAN FREEMAN PRETTY MUCH HAS THE ACTING MARKET
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CORNERED ON PLAYING GOD. THAT MUST LOOK GOOD ON
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THE RESUME.
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AGENT-TYPE PERSON:
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Oh, I see you have some prior acting experience,
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Mr. Freeman. What roles did you play?
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MORGAN FREEMAN:
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Oh, yeah. I played God.
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AGENT-TYPE PERSON:
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Oh... lol - but you're black. Wtf?
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MORGAN FREEMAN:
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*Shoots lightning bolt*
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AGENT-TYPE PERSON:
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*Dies*
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GORDON FREEMAN:
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Follow me.
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MORGAN FREEMAN:
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K, lol.
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[END-SCENE]
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GOD(MORGANFREEMAN)SPEED.
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