acidvegas/cancer
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cancer
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ISC License
Copyright (c) 2023, acidvegas <acid.vegas@acid.vegas>
Permission to use, copy, modify, and/or distribute this software for any
purpose with or without fee is hereby granted, provided that the above
copyright notice and this permission notice appear in all copies.
THE SOFTWARE IS PROVIDED "AS IS" AND THE AUTHOR DISCLAIMS ALL WARRANTIES
WITH REGARD TO THIS SOFTWARE INCLUDING ALL IMPLIED WARRANTIES OF
MERCHANTABILITY AND FITNESS. IN NO EVENT SHALL THE AUTHOR BE LIABLE FOR
ANY SPECIAL, DIRECT, INDIRECT, OR CONSEQUENTIAL DAMAGES OR ANY DAMAGES
WHATSOEVER RESULTING FROM LOSS OF USE, DATA OR PROFITS, WHETHER IN AN
ACTION OF CONTRACT, NEGLIGENCE OR OTHER TORTIOUS ACTION, ARISING OUT OF
OR IN CONNECTION WITH THE USE OR PERFORMANCE OF THIS SOFTWARE.

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# CANCER
> bad habits for internet relay chat
![](.screens/preview.png)
## Information
A fun bot that brings some bad habits on to IRC. Smoke cigarettes, smoke weed, and drink beer in your channels!
Blow `!smoke` in the face of the opers, get bloody buck from !chug and vomit over the backlog.
The bot includes colored ASCII art cigarettes, joints, and beers, that change everytime you drink or smoke.
There is a various games and other fun things that generally promote user interactions in the channel.
Try it out, join **#superbowl** on *irc.supernets.org* now, we have beer!
**Warning:** This bot highly encourages *unthrottled* flooding! This may or may not be suited for your IRC network and/or channel(s).
**Optional**: Network operator privledges can be given to the bot for a fun feature where if someone does `!smoke` and it is the last hit of a cigarette, they will have a 1 in 100 chance of being `/KILL`'d from the network, aka **KILLED BY CANCER**
## Commands
| Command | Description |
| --------------- | ---------------------------------------------------------- |
| `@cancer` | Information about the bot |
| `@cancer stats` | Return bot statistics for the channel |
| `!100` | 1 in 100 chance to get a 100 *(big `!smoke`)* |
| `!beer [nick]` | Grab a beer or toss one to someone |
| `!chainsmoke` | Start a game of Chain Smoke |
| `!chug` | Sip beer |
| `!dragrace` | Start a game of Drag Race |
| `!extendo` | 1 in 100 chance to get an EXTENDO *(big `!toke`)* |
| `!fatfuck` | 1 in 100 chance to get a FATFUCK *(fat `!smoke`/`!toke`)* |
| `!letschug` | LET'S FUCKING CHUG! |
| `!letstoke` | LET'S FUCKING TOKE! |
| `!toke` | Hit joint |
| `!smoke` | Hit cigarette |
| `!nosmoking` | Disable the bot for 30 seconds |
## Todo
- Too drunk/Vomit features trigged from `!chug`
- `!cigar` smoking and `!pizza` eating
- ASCII art for cigarette packs, lighter, nosmoking, vomit
- Fastest to respond w/ command timers for somthing.
- Keep track of how many chugged, smoked, & toked per-nick for `!top` command.
___
###### Mirrors
[acid.vegas](https://git.acid.vegas/cancer) • [GitHub](https://github.com/acidvegas/cancer) • [GitLab](https://gitlab.com/acidvegas/cancer) • [SourceHut](https://git.sr.ht/~acidvegas/cancer) • [SuperNETs](https://git.supernets.org/acidvegas/cancer)

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#!/usr/bin/env python
# Cancer IRC Bot - Developed by acidvegas in Python (https://git.acid.vegas/cancer)
'''
WARNING: This bot highly encourages flooding!
Commands:
@cancer | Information about the bot
@cancer stats | Return bot statistics for the channel
!100 | 1 in 100 chance to get a 100 (big !smoke)
!beer [nick] | Grab a beer or toss one to someone
!chainsmoke | Start a game of Chain Smoke
!chug | Sip beer
!dragrace | Start a game of Drag Race
!extendo | 1 in 100 chance to get an EXTENDO (big !toke)
!fatfuck | 1 in 100 chance to get a FATFUCK (fat !smoke/!toke)
!letschug | LET'S FUCKING CHUG!
!letstoke | LET'S FUCKING TOKE!
!toke | Hit joint
!smoke | Hit cigarette
!nosmoking | Disable the bot for 30 seconds
'''
import asyncio
import json
import os
import random
import ssl
import time
# Connection
server = 'irc.server.com'
port = 6697
use_ipv6 = False
use_ssl = True
vhost = None
channel = '#chats'
key = None
# Identity
nickname = 'CANCER'
username = 'smokesome'
realname = 'git.acid.vegas/cancer'
# Login
nickserv_password = None
network_password = None
operator_password = None
# Settings
user_modes = 'BdDg' # +d requires additional ! and @ to be in your set::channel-command-prefix on UnrealIRCd
# Formatting Control Characters / Color Codes
bold = '\x02'
italic = '\x1D'
underline = '\x1F'
reverse = '\x16'
reset = '\x0f'
white = '00'
black = '01'
blue = '02'
green = '03'
red = '04'
brown = '05'
purple = '06'
orange = '07'
yellow = '08'
light_green = '09'
cyan = '10'
light_cyan = '11'
light_blue = '12'
pink = '13'
grey = '14'
light_grey = '15'
def color(msg, foreground, background=None):
return f'\x03{foreground},{background}{msg}{reset}' if background else f'\x03{foreground}{msg}{reset}'
def debug(data):
print('{0} | [~] - {1}'.format(time.strftime('%I:%M:%S'), data))
def error(data, reason=None):
print('{0} | [!] - {1} ({2})'.format(time.strftime('%I:%M:%S'), data, str(reason))) if reason else print('{0} | [!] - {1}'.format(time.strftime('%I:%M:%S'), data))
def luck(odds):
return True if random.randint(1,odds) == 1 else False
def ssl_ctx():
ctx = ssl.create_default_context()
ctx.check_hostname = False
ctx.verify_mode = ssl.CERT_NONE
return ctx
class Generate: # degenerate *
def beer():
glass = color(' ', light_grey, light_grey)
return glass + color(''.join(random.choice((' :.')) for _ in range(9)), orange, yellow) + glass
def cigarette(size):
filter = color(';.`-,:.`;', yellow, orange)+color(' ', yellow, yellow)
cigarette = color('|'*size, light_grey, white)
cherry = color('\u259A', random.choice((red,yellow,orange)), black)+color('\u259A', random.choice((red,yellow,orange)), grey)
smoke = color('-' + ''.join(random.choice((';:-.,_`~\'')) for _ in range(random.randint(5,8))), grey)
return filter + cigarette + cherry + smoke
def joint(size):
joint = color('/'*size, light_grey, white)
cherry = color('\u259A', random.choice((red,yellow,orange)), black)+color('\u259A', random.choice((red,yellow,orange)), grey)
smoke = color('-' + ''.join(random.choice((';:-.,_`~\'')) for _ in range(random.randint(5,8))), grey)
return joint + cherry + smoke
def mug(size):
glass = color(' ', light_grey, light_grey)
empty = f'{glass} {glass}'
foam = glass + color(':::::::::', light_grey, white) + glass
bottom = color(' ', light_grey, light_grey)
mug = [foam,Generate.beer(),Generate.beer(),Generate.beer(),Generate.beer(),Generate.beer(),Generate.beer(),Generate.beer()]
for i in range(8-size):
mug.pop()
mug.insert(0, empty)
for i in range(len(mug)):
if i == 2 or i == 7:
mug[i] += glass + glass
elif i > 2 and i < 7:
mug[i] += ' ' + glass
mug.append(bottom)
return mug
class Bot():
def __init__(self):
self.fat = False
self.event = None
self.nicks = list()
self.stats = {'hits':25,'sips':8,'chugged':0,'smoked':0,'toked':0,'chain':0,'drag':0}
self.loops = {'chainsmoke':None,'dragrace':None,'letschug':None,'letstoke':None,'nosmoking':None,'timers':None}
self.status = True
self.reader = None
self.writer = None
async def raw(self, data):
self.writer.write(data[:510].encode('utf-8') + b'\r\n')
await self.writer.drain()
async def action(self, chan, msg):
await self.sendmsg(chan, f'\x01ACTION {msg}\x01')
async def sendmsg(self, target, msg):
await self.raw(f'PRIVMSG {target} :{msg}')
async def notice(self, target, msg):
await self.raw(f'NOTICE {target} :{msg}')
async def connect(self):
while True:
try:
options = {
'host' : server,
'port' : port,
'limit' : 1024,
'ssl' : ssl_ctx() if use_ssl else None,
'family' : 10 if use_ipv6 else 2,
'local_addr' : vhost
}
self.reader, self.writer = await asyncio.wait_for(asyncio.open_connection(**options), 15)
await self.raw(f'USER {username} 0 * :{realname}')
await self.raw('NICK ' + nickname)
except Exception as ex:
error('error: failed to connect to ' + server, ex)
else:
if os.path.isfile('stats.json'):
with open('stats.json') as stats_file:
self.stats = json.loads(stats_file.read())
debug('reloaded stats')
await self.listen()
for loop in self.loops:
if self.loops[loop]:
self.loops[loop].cancel()
self.stats['chain'] = 0
self.stats['drag'] = 0
self.event = None
self.nicks = list()
self.status = True
finally:
await asyncio.sleep(30)
async def loop_nosmoking(self):
await asyncio.sleep(30)
self.status = True
async def loop_timers(self):
while True:
try:
if time.strftime('%I:%M') == '04:20':
await self.sendmsg(channel, color('S M O K E W E E D E R R D A Y', light_green))
await self.sendmsg(channel, color('ITZ DAT MUTHA FUCKN 420 BITCH', yellow))
await self.sendmsg(channel, color('LIGHT UP A NICE GOOD FAT FUCK', red))
await asyncio.sleep(120)
elif time.strftime('%I:%M %p') == '02:00 AM':
await self.sendmsg(channel, '.ascii phish')
await asyncio.sleep(120)
elif time.strftime('%I:%M') == '12:00': # the biscuit hour..
with open('stats.json', 'w') as stats_file:
json.dump(self.stats, stats_file)
await asyncio.sleep(120)
except Exception as ex:
error('error: loop_timers failed', ex)
finally:
await asyncio.sleep(20)
async def loop_chainsmoke(self):
self.nicks = dict()
try:
await self.notice(channel, 'Starting a round of {0} in {1} seconds!'.format(color('ChainSmoke', red), color('10', white)))
await self.notice(channel, '[{0}] {1} {2} {3}'.format(color('How To Play', light_blue), color('Type', yellow), color('!smoke', light_green), color('to hit a cigarette. The cigarette goes down a little after each hit. Once you finish a cigarette, a new one will be lit for you. You will have 60 seconds to chain smoke as many cigarettes as possible.', yellow)))
await asyncio.sleep(10)
await self.action(channel, 'Round starts in 3...')
await asyncio.sleep(1)
await self.action(channel, '2...')
await asyncio.sleep(1)
await self.action(channel, '1...')
await asyncio.sleep(1)
await self.action(channel, color('GO', light_green))
self.status = True
await asyncio.sleep(60)
self.status = False
await self.sendmsg(channel, color(' CHAINSMOKE ROUND IS OVER ', red, yellow))
await asyncio.sleep(1)
await self.sendmsg(channel, color(' CHAINSMOKE ROUND IS OVER ', red, yellow))
await asyncio.sleep(1)
await self.sendmsg(channel, color(' CHAINSMOKE ROUND IS OVER ', red, yellow))
await self.sendmsg(channel, color('Counting cigarette butts...', yellow))
await asyncio.sleep(10)
await self.sendmsg(channel, '{0} smoked {1} cigarettes!'.format(channel, color(str(self.stats['chain']), light_blue)))
if self.nicks:
guy = max(self.nicks, key=self.nicks.get)
await self.sendmsg(channel, '{0} smoked the most cigarettes... {1}'.format(guy, self.nicks[guy]))
except Exception as ex:
error('error: loop_chainsmoke failed', ex)
finally:
self.stats['chain'] = 0
self.nicks = list()
self.event = None
self.status = True
async def loop_dragrace(self):
self.hits = 25
try:
await self.notice(channel, 'Starting a round of {0} in {1} seconds!'.format(color('DragRace', red), color('10', white)))
await self.notice(channel, '[{0}] {1} {2} {3}'.format(color('How To Play', light_blue), color('Type', yellow), color('!smoke', light_green), color('to hit a cigarette. The cigarette goes down a little after each hit. You will have 10 seconds to smoke as quickly as possible.', yellow)))
await asyncio.sleep(10)
await self.action(channel, 'Round starts in 3...')
await asyncio.sleep(1)
await self.action(channel, '2...')
await asyncio.sleep(1)
await self.action(channel, '1...')
await asyncio.sleep(1)
await self.action(channel, color('GO', light_green))
self.stats['drag'] = time.time()
except Exception as ex:
error('error: loop_dragrace failed', ex)
finally:
self.status = True
async def loop_letschug(self, nick):
self.nicks.append(nick)
try:
await self.sendmsg(channel, color(f'OH SHIT {nick} is drunk', light_green))
await self.notice(channel, color(f'Time to TOTALLY CHUG in {channel.upper()} in 30 seconds, type !chug to join', light_green))
await asyncio.sleep(10)
await self.sendmsg(channel, color('LOL we CHUG in 20 get ready ' + ' '.join(self.nicks), light_green))
await asyncio.sleep(10)
await self.sendmsg(channel, color('YO we CHUG in 10 get ready ' + ' '.join(self.nicks), light_green))
await asyncio.sleep(5)
await self.sendmsg(channel, color('alright CHUG in 5', light_green))
await asyncio.sleep(1)
await self.sendmsg(channel, color('4..', light_green))
await asyncio.sleep(1)
await self.sendmsg(channel, color('3..', light_green))
await asyncio.sleep(1)
await self.sendmsg(channel, color('2..', light_green))
await asyncio.sleep(1)
await self.sendmsg(channel, color('1..', light_green))
await asyncio.sleep(1)
await self.sendmsg(channel, color(' '.join(self.nicks) + ' .. CHUG!', light_green))
except Exception as ex:
error('error: loop_letschug failed', ex)
finally:
self.event = None
self.nicks = list()
async def loop_letstoke(self, nick):
self.nicks.append(nick)
try:
await self.sendmsg(channel, color(f'YO {nick} is high', light_green))
await self.notice(channel, color(f'Time to FUCKING toke in {channel.upper()}, type !toke to join', light_green))
await asyncio.sleep(10)
await self.sendmsg(channel, color('OH SHIT we toke in 20 get ready ' + ' '.join(self.nicks), light_green))
await asyncio.sleep(10)
await self.sendmsg(channel, color('OH SHIT we toke in 10 get ready ' + ' '.join(self.nicks), light_green))
await asyncio.sleep(5)
await self.sendmsg(channel, color('alright toke in 5', light_green))
await asyncio.sleep(1)
await self.sendmsg(channel, color('4..', light_green))
await asyncio.sleep(1)
await self.sendmsg(channel, color('3..', light_green))
await asyncio.sleep(1)
await self.sendmsg(channel, color('2..', light_green))
await asyncio.sleep(1)
await self.sendmsg(channel, color('1..', light_green))
await asyncio.sleep(1)
await self.sendmsg(channel, color(' '.join(self.nicks) + ' .. toke!', light_green))
except Exception as ex:
error('error: loop_letstoke failed', ex)
finally:
self.event = None
self.nicks = list()
async def listen(self):
while True:
try:
if self.reader.at_eof():
break
data = await asyncio.wait_for(self.reader.readuntil(b'\r\n'), 500)
line = data.decode('utf-8').strip()
args = line.split()
debug(line)
if line.startswith('ERROR :Closing Link:'):
raise Exception('Connection has closed.')
elif args[0] == 'PING':
await self.raw('PONG '+args[1][1:])
elif args[1] == '001':
if user_modes:
await self.raw(f'MODE {nickname} +{user_modes}')
if nickserv_password:
await self.sendmsg('NickServ', f'IDENTIFY {nickname} {nickserv_password}')
if operator_password:
await self.raw(f'OPER {username} {operator_password}')
await self.raw(f'JOIN {channel} {key}') if key else await self.raw('JOIN ' + channel)
self.loops['timers'] = asyncio.create_task(self.loop_timers())
elif args[1] == '433':
error('The bot is already running or nick is in use.') # nick change
elif args[1] == 'INVITE' and len(args) == 4:
invited = args[2]
chan = args[3][1:]
if invited == nickname and chan == channel:
await self.raw(f'JOIN {channel} {key}') if key else await self.raw('JOIN ' + channel)
elif args[1] == 'KICK' and len(args) >= 4:
chan = args[2]
kicked = args[3]
if kicked == nickname and chan == channel:
await asyncio.sleep(3)
await self.raw(f'JOIN {channel} {key}') if key else await self.raw('JOIN ' + channel)
elif args[1] == 'PART' and len(args) >= 3:
chan = args[2]
if chan == channel:
nick = args[0].split('!')[0][1:]
await self.action(nick, f'blows smoke in {nick}\'s face...')
elif args[1] == 'PRIVMSG' and len(args) >= 4:
nick = args[0].split('!')[0][1:]
chan = args[2]
msg = ' '.join(args[3:])[1:]
if chan == channel:
if self.status:
args = msg.split()
if msg == '@cancer':
await self.sendmsg(chan, bold + 'CANCER IRC Bot - Developed by acidvegas in Python - https://git.acid.vegas/cancer')
elif msg == '@cancer stats':
await self.sendmsg(chan, 'Chugged : {0} beers {1}'.format(color(self.stats['chugged'], light_blue), color('({0:,} cases)'.format(int(self.stats['chugged']/24)), grey)))
await self.sendmsg(chan, 'Smoked : {0} cigarettes {1}'.format(color(self.stats['smoked'], light_blue), color('({0:,} packs)'.format(int(self.stats['smoked']/24)), grey)))
await self.sendmsg(chan, 'Toked : {0} joints {1}'.format(color(self.stats['toked'], light_blue), color('({0:,} grams)'.format(int(self.stats['toked']/3)), grey)))
elif msg in ('!100','!extendo','!fatfuck') and luck(100):
if msg == '!fatfuck':
self.fat = True
await self.sendmsg(chan, '{0}{1}{2}'.format(color(' !!! ', red, green), color('AWWW SHIT, IT\'S TIME FOR THAT MARLBORO FATFUCK', black, green), color(' !!! ', red, green)))
else:
self.stats['hits'] = 100
if msg == '!100':
await self.sendmsg(chan, '{0}{1}{2}'.format(color(' !!! ', white, red), color('AWWW SHIT, IT\'S TIME FOR THAT NEWPORT 100', red, white), color(' !!! ', white, red)))
else:
await self.sendmsg(chan, '{0}{1}{2}'.format(color(' !!! ', red, green), color('OHHH FUCK, IT\'S TIME FOR THAT 420 EXTENDO', yellow, green), color(' !!! ', red, green)))
elif args[0] == '!beer':
if len(args) == 1:
target = nick
elif len(args) == 2:
target = args[1]
beer = '{0}{1}{2}'.format(color(' ', white, white), color(' BUD ', white, random.choice((blue,brown))), color('c', grey, white))
await self.action(chan, f'throws {color(target, white)} an ice cold {beer} =)')
if luck(100):
await asyncio.sleep(2)
await self.action(chan, 'suddenly feels more gay...')
elif msg == '!chainsmoke' and not self.event:
self.status = False
self.event = 'chainsmoke'
self.loops['chainsmoke'] = asyncio.create_task(self.loop_chainsmoke())
elif msg == '!chug':
if self.event == 'letschug':
if nick in self.nicks:
await self.sendmsg(chan, color(nick + ' you are already chuggin u wastoid!', light_green))
else:
self.nicks.append(nick)
await self.sendmsg(chan, color(nick + ' joined the CHUG session!', light_green))
else:
if self.stats['sips'] <= 0:
self.stats['sips'] = 8
self.stats['chugged'] += 1
for line in Generate.mug(self.stats['sips']):
await self.sendmsg(chan, line)
self.stats['sips'] -= random.choice((1,2))
elif msg == '!dragrace' and not self.event:
self.status = False
self.event = 'dragrace'
self.loops['dragrace'] = asyncio.create_task(self.loop_dragrace())
elif msg == '!letschug' and not self.event:
self.event = 'letschug'
self.loops['letschug'] = asyncio.create_task(self.loop_letschug(nick))
elif msg == '!letstoke' and not self.event:
self.event = 'letstoke'
self.loops['letstoke'] = asyncio.create_task(self.loop_letstoke(nick))
elif msg == '!nosmoking':
self.status = False
self.loops['nosmoking'] = asyncio.create_task(self.loop_nosmoking())
elif msg in ('!smoke','!toke'):
option = 'smoked' if msg == '!smoke' else 'toked'
if self.event == 'letstoke' and msg == '!toke':
if nick in self.nicks:
await self.sendmsg(chan, color(nick + ' you are already toking u stoner!', light_green))
else:
self.nicks.append(nick)
await self.sendmsg(chan, color(nick + ' joined the TOKE session!', light_green))
else:
if self.stats['hits'] <= 0:
self.stats['hits'] = 25
self.stats[option] += 1
if self.fat:
self.fat = False
if self.event == 'chainsmoke' and msg == '!smoke':
self.nicks[nick] = self.nicks[nick]+1 if nick in self.nicks else 1
self.stats['chain'] += 1
elif self.event == 'dragrace' and msg == '!smoke':
await self.sendmsg(chan, 'It took {0} seconds for {1} to smoke a cigarette!'.format(color('{:.2f}'.format(time.time()-self.stats['drag']), light_blue), color(chan, white)))
self.event = None
self.stats['drag'] = 0
elif luck(25) and msg == '!smoke':
await self.raw(f'KILL {nick} CANCER KILLED {nick.upper()} - QUIT SMOKING TODAY! +1 800-QUIT-NOW')
else:
object = Generate.cigarette(self.stats['hits']) if msg == '!smoke' else Generate.joint(self.stats['hits'])
cigarette = Generate.cigarette(self.stats['hits'])
if self.fat:
for i in range(3):
await self.sendmsg(chan, object)
else:
await self.sendmsg(chan, object)
self.stats['hits'] -= random.choice((1,2))
except (UnicodeDecodeError, UnicodeEncodeError):
pass
except Exception as ex:
error(self.display + 'fatal error occured', ex)
break
# Main
asyncio.run(Bot().connect())